Take a Chance – Make a Change!

We all follow our own path through life, and no one’s journey is the same as anyone else’s.  You may dream of attaining certain things in life, but find you’re selling yourself short, or holding yourself back.  You reflect on your situation, and notice you’re seemingly stuck in a holding pattern.  Why is this, you wonder?  Why is it so hard to make a change?  Switch jobs, move to a new place, lose or gain weight, fix your relationship with your partner, pick up a new activity or hobby, make new friends.  You ask yourself, “What is holding me back from change?”

I find that many people hold themselves back from achieving great things due to three change-related obstacles: fear, lack of support, and self-esteem and confidence issues.

FEAR – Fear is one of the most common emotions responsible for holding us back from making the changes necessary to achieve our goals.  We may fear lots of things:  what other people might think of us, what financial risks might be involved in our decision-making process, and what impact our decision to make a change might cause in our lives, as well as in the lives of our loved ones.  Remedy – Acknowledge your fear.  Accept it, work through it, and don’t push it away.  Develop positive associations with the emotion (i.e. “I’m scared, but this is because I know this is important to me, and my fear means that I care.”).  Work on not being so affected by what others think:  this is your life, and nobody else’s.

LACK OF SUPPORT– Support can come in many forms (emotional, financial, interpersonal), and it means different things to all of us; however, without some form of support, it might be very difficult to take a step towards whatever it is that you’re hoping to achieve.  Remedy – Maintain regular contact with close friends, family, and loved ones.  Ask them for their thoughts, ideas, and perspectives on whatever it may be that you’re striving to attain.  You may not always agree with them, or utilize their advice, but keeping an open mind is vital.  You can also broaden your network by trying new things, going to new places, and talking to new people to develop a stronger support system.

SELF ESTEEM and CONFIDENCE – How we feel about ourselves is often reflective of the choices we make in life.  If we succumb to feeling depressed or anxious, we can sometimes feel too constrained to take a chance to prove to ourselves that we can actually achieve great things. We might then settle for less, or tell ourselves we don’t deserve success, and may even be ashamed to show our true selves to the world.  Remedy – Positive self-talk, challenging your automatic thoughts, and working through personal insecurities can help uncover the best version of yourself.

Highlighting the advantages and disadvantages of how to make a change, as opposed to remaining static, is no easy task; however, it can help reveal some answers that should help guide you in a direction that works best for you.  Still stuck?  Contact me to discuss your unique situation, and I’d be happy to help!


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